One Year Ago...

I know I haven't posted for a very long time and I'm not sure why.  We've certainly been busy enough this past year to fill page after page but this has been a year where I've mostly just pondered things and mulled them over, not really able to express them like I usually am able to do.

Today marks 1 year since the accident our boys were in last December. It is amazing how well things turned out. When I think back to a year ago, waiting patiently for permission to go see our boys. We were in Abbotsford Emergency waiting room in shock and disbelief, worried, scared and uncertain of what we would be faced with. Someone brought us all the fixings from Tim Horton's so we could have tea. One of our elders and a visiting pastor (who is now our permanent pastor!) came to see us and pray with us.  I remember lots of tears that day.  I remember the amazingly supportive Abbotsford Police officers and the caring staff in ER. I remember wondering over and over again if our Stam family was about to change in a way that none of us would be able to handle because we are so close and to lose one of us would have been devastating. The whole time I was going through all these emotions, I remember feeling clear and certain that God would provide the strength we needed, that it would all work out for His honour and that, ultimately, He only had our spiritual good in mind even though our flesh was going through something so hard.

Then we had the flurry of cancelling Jeremy & Bailey's wedding for the 22nd and not being sure when it would be rebooked. Instead of spending Dec 22nd in a joyful celebration, we all sat together outside of RCH ICU and prayed and begged and cried because at that point we still weren't certain whether or not Jordan would live. To call what we were living through agony would be an understatement. And, if I was feeling this so strongly and am just Jordan's aunt, I can't even imagine what was going through dear Doug & Yvonne's minds. I saw a broken father and mother worried sick about their son but remaining strong in spite of their brokenness.

Our Christmas last year held none of the traditions our Stam family is used to. We had a small Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve with just a few of us. It was very quiet (and, if you know the Stams, you know they are NOT quiet by nature!). Nothing was the same. It felt like we went through those days on autopilot. Our hearts were somewhat lightened when we heard that Jordan was moved out of ICU because he was doing so well! That was beyond our expectations and can only be described as a miracle.

It is one thing to have family & friends with you through the good times, but it is something else when they are there during a time of crisis and standing in the gap for you in prayer, holding you when you don't think you can stand one more minute, and ministering to you. As soon as we got home from the hospital on Friday morning, 2 of my very dear and precious friends, Leanne M and Charmain DH didn't just phone but came to our house to make sure I was okay. There are no words to describe what that means at a time like we were in. I remember arriving home on the Saturday and my sisters, Ruth and Teresa, bringing us soup and baking for us for Sunday. It's things like these that might seem little but they really aren't.  They make all the difference! Then I remember Bob & Marianne popping in late that night just to be with us and to hug us. On the Sunday, Doug called us to tell us that Jordan woke up and was recognizing people! On the Monday I was allowed to go into ICU with Yvonne to see him and I will never forget him opening his eyes, seeing me, and giving me a big smile while he opened his arms for a hug and said, "It's so good to see you, Auntie Sandra"!

When things with Jordan were improving so much, Jeremy & Bailey's wedding date was rescheduled for Dec 28 and everything went very well. I know I promised to post pictures but I totally forgot.  I will try to get a few of those up by their 1st anniversary!

We are so blessed to have so many loving friends, a caring family & church family, and a complete Stam family.

This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)